Ever since my twin brother, Kyle, was killed in a road accident, I’ve come here in the late afternoon, to meditate and reflect. I sit here, overlooking the scene, and try and make sense of what happened. It was only a week ago, but the pain feels like a year of winter.

His car swerved off the coast road into a barrier and he was killed instantly. The post-mortem found he was well over the drink-drive limit, as he often was. The times we had all warned him…

I put on my headphones and try and chase the negative chatter from my mind. I’ve been using a system of binaural beats to help me drift into alpha state and relax. Ironically, it was Kyle who introduced me to it.

I must have fallen asleep, for almost the first time since it happened. After thirty minutes the audio moves on from alpha, into theta – where we access our dreams and nightmares. Another half hour, and it’s deeper into delta, where healing and regeneration takes place.

But to me, it all happened in an instant. I’m in the car with Kyle, as he’s driving towards the coast road lights. I’m telling him to slow down. But he’s telling me “No!”

His lips aren’t moving, it’s like I’m reading his thoughts. He could maybe stop the car this time, without hitting the girl on the crossing. But he can’t stop his drink driving. He said he’d already ‘seen’ his future. Soon, he will hit and kill someone. He said this way is ‘for the best’. He half turns to me and smiles. “See ya!”

Then I’m gone. Back on the grass, near a busy road junction, tears streaming down my face. Nothing in my headphones but silence.

This story is inspired by the photo supplied by Al Forbes of Sunday Photo Fiction, April 17th 2016.  For more details click the logo.

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