Artist’s Impression

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Photo and Fiction © Steve Lakey 2014

 

I’m a Seafront Artist. Like a piece of smooth wood on the beach, I sort of drifted into it: the business was handed down from father to son. But of course, I’ve taken it to the next level.

I found creating the artwork a bit of a bind in the early days. But – needs must, and all that. Good job I’m a bit of a genius with modern technology.

You probably know the drill: I take a few photos of you, and when you return, 30 minutes later, there you are – in a cartoon style, or looking like a Hollywood star. I’m nothing if not versatile.
If you like what you see, you might want to look at my watercolours, or oils.

I’m always one for making a good impression, wearing my traditional beret, pencil moustache and artist’s smock. A half-completed masterpiece on the easel…

During the summer season, I spend my days in my brightly coloured beach hut, which doubles as an artist’s studio. But, with me, I’m afraid not everything is as it seems.

My hut isn’t wood. Too high-maintenance. It’s made from brightly covered materials that will still look good in fifty years time. Much like myself, I suppose!

Don’t ask where I get the feed for my wi-fi and satellite TV. I’m not telling about either.

So, what will your picture be mate, humorous or classic?

What! You’re a copper? Got to be kidding me. So, okay, I use computer software to make pictures. I never actually say that I paint ‘em myself. Not illegal is it? Don’t you put those cuffs on me! I’ve got a reputation to think about.

I’ve been framed!

 

The photo and story were prompted by Pixel Prose Challenge, November 16th 2014, hosted by Amanda Lakey at UniqueArtChic.comClick the logo for more details.

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To view other posts in this challenge, click here.

 

Food Forethought

Leo/Lissie                        Leo                                                            Lissie

(Leo)
Not much of a barker
I don’t like to yap
you’ll see my tail wagging
when I’ve had a nap.

Oh, give me a minute
I just need to rest
if you want to see me
looking my best.

When it’s dinner time
please just pat my head
and in forty winks
I’ll be out of my bed.

(Lissie)
You won’t catch me
lying snug in my bed
when there’s a good chance
of me getting fed.

I’m older and wiser
of that there’s no doubt.
I don’t waste my time
in running about.

I’ll make an exception
when there’s food in my bowl
I’m first in the queue
cos that’s how I roll.

The photo and poem were prompted by Pixel Prose Challenge, October 26th 2014, hosted by Amanda Lakey at UniqueArtChic.comClick the logo for more details.

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To view other posts in this challenge, click on the blue frog.

Train of Thought

 

Passenger

Photo and Poetry © Steve Lakey 2014

Hey, you there! Hear what I say!
I just can’t stand being sat all day.
Though the odd delay wouldn’t hurt a bit
They’ve made me look like a First Class twit.

The service on this train is poor
No steward’s entered through my door,
It’s the last time I will use a train
the standards have gone down the drain.

Sitting like a tailor’s dummy
I don’t intend to pay out money,
Until this carriage moves a mile
This whole trip has been just vile.

No more do I want to roam
I just want to get back home,
Even you would want to fidget
If you’d been left like a wax exhibit.

The photo was taken at the National Railway Museum, York, UK. I wondered what the ‘gentleman’ in the photo might be thinking…

The photo and poem were prompted by Pixel Prose Challenge, October 19th 2014, hosted by Amanda Lakey at UniqueArtChic.comClick the logo for more details.

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To view other posts in this challenge, click on the blue frog.

Trial by Fire

Telescope

Photo: © Al Forbes 2014. Fiction: © Steve Lakey 2014 

 

My neighbours had turned me in. They told me I was a stupid teenager to break the telescope. How could anyone see the boats coming in now? They said that boys like me only cared about ourselves and gave the village a bad name.

How very brave of them, disowning me through the bars of my cell, before walking away. But I couldn’t live in the world that they accepted, and I had to do something – anything – to tear it down.

The Police had tried to break me, to see me cry. I had cried once, but told them nothing they wanted to know. The hours passed. They had been ‘nice’, and they had used threats. But I had not given in.

“Why that particular telescope? Why now?”

“What other offences of vandalism have you committed?”

“Who else was involved?”

The two policemen weren’t trying to establish guilt – that was already decided from the moment my name was passed on. They wanted to see who else they could pull in. I didn’t have to hold out for long.  I knew they weren’t going to bother a magistrate with a case like this…

My cell door opened and I was led out, blinking, into the sunlit courtyard. A line of grey-clad soldiers were waiting, rifles by their sides.

As the blindfold plunged me into darkness, I cleared my throat and shouted with my last breath.

“Soon the Allies will come and you will be gone! Vive la France!”

 

This story was prompted by Sunday Photo Fiction October 19th 2014, hosted by Al Forbes. Click the logo for more details.

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 To view other entries in this challenge, click the blue frog.

Steady Eddie

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Photo and Poetry © Steve Lakey 2014

When you get to my age
the years start to hurtle
I’m a giant tortoise
not a ninja turtle!

It’s time to embrace
nature’s given me a hint
that Life is a marathon,
there’s no need to sprint!

Don’t pass me by
without giving a wave
for all you know
I’ve one foot in the grave.

But don’t write me off
I’m not feeling down
won’t call it a day
’til I’m put underground.

Some call me a saint,
some say I’m a sinner
what matters to me
is I still get me dinner.

I don’t need a toast
so don’t raise your glass
shift out of my way
it’s time for lush grass!

This photo and poem are prompted by Pixel Prose Challenge, October 12th 2014, hosted by Amanda Lakey at UniqueArtChic.com

Click the logo for more details.

pixel-prose-challenge-post-logo-c2a9-www-uniqueartchic-com

To view other posts in this challenge, click on the blue frog.